I watched the season premiere of ABC’s remake of “V” tonight and I must say, I feel a little jipped. Not jipped by a lack of good special effects, there were plenty of those. Not jipped by a lack of fighting, shooting, or yelling. Plenty of those too. Actually I feel jipped because there was too much of everything. Too much story. By the first commercial break we already knew that the “Visitors” were up to no good. I feel like I missed out on the fun of finding out what these “V’s” are all about. There was no time to ponder how our daily lives might be affected if ID-4’s came down from the heavens tomorrow. It wasn’t scary, only because there was no time to let it really sink in. I know it’s a remake and there’s not really any surprises, but dude! We already know they’re lizards on the first episode!? Isn’t it all downhill from here? Maybe the producers have something cool and surely J.J. Abramstastic planned for the storyline, or maybe we DVR owners, with our short attention spans have forced the networks into a plot point/pipe-laying frenzy. Either way, the ONE HOUR season premiere was so fast that I barely had time to give a goot got damn about any of the characters. I’ll give it my normal “3 episode” test run, but if it hasn’t gotten hooks in me by then, I’m going to call it quits and netflix the Battlestar Galactica remake, which I somehow totally missed out on the first time around.